As he looked down onto the snowy mountainside, he couldn't help but study on all the people he saw below. Inching along at a snail's pace, his 2-person chairlift slowly crept towards the summit. On this uncharacteristically sunny day, The Bearded Man knew that he was in snowboarder's paradise. In late March and early April, you get a handful of these perfect days - when the weather's gotten warmer but the snow hasn't yet melted, and the resorts are open for one last hurrah before finally closing the season down for summer. As luck would have it, a stunning Swedish girl was sitting right next to him, and judging by how things were going, they'd clearly have at least 10 more minutes to either sit in silence or strike up a conversation. She was certainly pretty, and what's more, she held in her right hand an unopened can of beer. Perfection. The Bearded Man couldn't help himself: "You're so beautiful!" he cried. She was flattered, and she blushed and smiled as she looked back at him, captivated by his godly beard. "Huh?" The Bearded Man said. "Oh right, yes, you are too, I mean, of course, but I was actually talking to the beer…"