"Miracle In The Middle Of My Heart") "Push and turn and step and turn and pivot and turn and step and step..." Things were heating up. It was the middle of Richard Simmons' 'Party Off The Pounds' competition, and The Bearded Man was hot on the heels of Davis McGraw, reigning local champ. For the first time in his calisthenics career, he had come across someone with as thick of a beard as his own. This wasn't going to be easy. He had breezed through the semis against a bunch of non-bearded losers, but this guy? His beard had the goods. Facial hair was flying every which way as the two blasted their glutes to the sounds of TRU Concept and PYT. Sweat poured down the faces of the two gentlemen. To be clear, these men were NOT in good shape. Nor were they particularly physically attractive. Still, they danced with such fire and fury that women of all ages swooned with delight. For the first time ever, the championship was declared a draw. One judge said that he had such a hard time choosing, that this battle would forever be called "The Miracle in the Middle of His Heart." And so that epic moment was dubbed once and for all.